Tonight I went to foot of the cross an incredible worship service that is student lead. I began listening intently to the lyrics of the songs and I realized that God's love is so great and so awesome and complete. It is such a great blessing to be in a country that we are not condemned for our love for our saviour, to know that our Lord is God and be able to worship so freely. I listened to this song to think God is jealous of our love, do we love things or other people too much and not spend enough time reflecting in his presence?
I look back to my past- the things that came before Roberts and some images continue to haunt my mind. One being this photo:
I see the concern in my mothers eyes the concern only a mother can provide, but I know that my heavenly father loves me so much more, wishing so much more and being able to provide such a greater gift and presence. It amazes me to see this plan he has laid before me. Being able to go to college was something I never dreamed of when I looked into nurses' eyes with fear and fright. Now I go boldly into this world this new transition. I cannot believe that I will be starting college tomorrow- something different a new path to unfold and I feel that in some ways- I am almost not content with my situation.
I feel as though we go so boldly and so confidently we forget to realize just how great our God really is. To give us a saviour and to give us a life of which we are given free will and still provides for us even when we fall short of the glory of God. I realized tonight that in order to discover God fully and understand what his will is, I must not only seek it with my full heart and being but I also have to be willing to surrender everything to him including the things that may be difficult. It has been hard for me to be gone away from home and my comfort zone- however I also am struggling with my relationships getting here. Being able to trust everyone and being able to meet new people and be relaxed. I am an outgoing person however I also fear that I will be hurt and ripped apart in some way trusting too much into someone else. In this I realized the only thing that will give me no disappointment is being able to surrender to God even in the slightest bit and giving everything over to Him. To a greater glory and purpose beyond my own personal understanding. So with this I surrender.
I will update more later about my dorm, and things of that nature but I encourage you to take some time to reflect in the things that God has provided the greatness he has given us. For it is to Him we must direct our praise and glory. I give thanks. Thanks for all that I am given in such a broken and undeserving life. Click the links to see youtube videos with the music that we sang tonight at foot of the cross.