Well, this weekend I have found myself in the familiar setting of doctor’s offices... I got more blood work done and a possible diagnosis of lupus, and Poly-cystic Ovary Syndrome.
They want to get the results of another series of tests before confirming... It was so obscure being back into the hands of the medical field... Friends at college have been saying to me lately do you even still go here? It's almost a twinge of pain that comes along with the question as I remember the long months in the hospital through High School. I trust in the Lord that the pain doesn't last forever... The light at the end of the tunnel is coming and it's just a matter of when. Until then I continue to wait on His faithfulness.
Then tonight, as my mom was getting ready to go to bed she told me to come over and give her a hug, with much reluctance I got up and gave her a hug. She sat there and embraced my body close to hers... She hugged me like she has for the past nineteen years holding my body and just embracing the moment. She told me how when I was younger I used to sit on her lap and pretend she was my chair. We laughed as I used to be called the family "lopper" and I used to love to snuggle...
I got teary as I thought, mom hugs are a finite resource. You cannot get unlimited supply of these wonderful embraces and her love is truly sacrificial toward our family. She is truly incredible... Tonight I can go to bed knowing that my mother loves me, there is so much unknown but there is the known also and that's what I am holding onto tonight. I have an eternal perspective and I am holding onto the fact that my mom's hugs are only a glimpse of those my eternal father will be able to yield.