Depression.

This word has been tossed around a lot lately in my life...
It is used to describe feelings, people, situations I have been far removed from, situations that are up close and personal...

No matter what: there seems to be a common trend: they don't know.

When I was listening to someone reflect how his friend had committed suicide: he kept saying... I don't know how he got to where he was. And I don't know how it could have gotten so bad... He was totally miffed.

Those affected by the depression often are quoted saying: I don't know how to get out of this, and I don't know why things are they way they are or I don't know why I think the things I do.

Afterwards, there is the recollection of good times and the desire to retreat to the comfort of those wonderful days. However, there is no way to return to those particular days and they continue to wonder where they went wrong.

Depression is peculiar to me. I don't understand it... It makes me sad though, because I can't explain it or totally grasp it and I wonder sometimes if it's just something that has no answer.