Deep in my teenage heart I long for this sense of understanding. I don't know what I lack but it seems like nothing is right. I notice as I am in the hospital longer the family gets a little more tense. It's a little more difficult for me to deal with everyone and I am having a tough time dealing with what is going on. People tell me to be positive, they all have a laundry list of instruction but yet they cannot do it themselves.
When it is all over... What will it really matter? I really don't feel like fighting for friendship after friendship to feel tumbled over. I feel so confused. I don't understand the world and I feel beaten down. This is the worst time to be feeling so small but between the loud TV my roommate needs to watch and I am just sick of everything.
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