Through the last few weeks a residual seems to lie underneath the conversations that I have, the thoughts I possess. There is a secret underlying pain that is unmentioned and confusing beyond measure. Something I just cannot begin to explain.
After reading the book Waking the Dead by: John Eldredge it made me re-examine my life and come face to face with my heart and what it would mean to be totally restored in the Lord. It is incredible when you think of how you can love deeper and more real if you find that purification of your own heart.
"The tabernacle itself was a picture of something... amazing. It is a kind of mythic symbol, given to us to help us understand a deeper eternal reality. Each person knows that now his body is the temple of God: 'Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?' (1 Cor. 6:19). Indeed it is. 'Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?' (1 Cor. 3:16). Okay -- each of us is now the temple of God. So where, then, is the Holy of Holies?"
"That's right -- your heart. Paul teaches in Ephesians that 'Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith' (3:17). God comes down to dwell in us, in our hearts. Now, we know this: God cannot dwell where there is evil. 'You are not a God who takes pleasure in evil; with you the wicked cannot dwell' (Ps. 5:4). Something pretty dramatic must have happened in our hearts, then, to make them fit to be the dwelling place of God."
"Of course, none of this can happen for us until we give our lives back to God. We cannot know the joy or the life or the freedom of heart I've described until we surrender our lives to Jesus and surrender them totally... We turn, and give ourselves body, soul, and spirit back to God, asking him to cleanse our hearts and make them new. And he does. He gives us a new heart. And he comes to dwell there, in our hearts."
-- John Eldredge in "Waking the Dead"
What rang truest to me was that our hearts are good. We are good, and God intended us to do good and be wonderfully made in his image. God doesn't make junk and the world junks us up... I am simply amazed by how many lies can fill my life and the lives of so many others when we look into how our self image is brought down so low, how deeply painful it is to hear you're beautiful and that you matter.
It makes me reflect in the matter that we are good, and what lies have we bought into? I ask you tonight to reflect in your own being- what lies are in your heart? What are you believing? Do you sincerely believe your heart is good? I know that I haven't for a long time and it's a painful journey to find good. Then it leads me to ask even further, if we're not believing with our purified hearts and knowing we are good, how can we love fully? How can we love perfect love when we cannot see we are good? God wants to get in and minister to the needs of our hearts. The brokenness of our hearts- we just need to let him. Allow him in to heal, help us restore our love to fulfill his good and perfect will. It's incredible.